AVAILABLE FOR IMMEDIATE EMPLOYMENT

JEAN
JIMOTHY

One raccoon.
Two first names.
Absolutely no references.

Jean Jimothy, a raccoon in a blond bob wig and vintage suit — EMPLOYEE OF THE MOMENT **J. JIMOTHY**

PENDING
APPROVAL

EXCELLENT HAIR◆ QUESTIONABLE HANDWRITING◆ STRONG TRASH MANAGEMENT◆ TWO FIRST NAMES◆ EXCELLENT HAIR◆ QUESTIONABLE HANDWRITING◆ STRONG TRASH MANAGEMENT◆ TWO FIRST NAMES◆

01 / CURRICULUM VITAE

PROFESSIONALLY
UNQUALIFIED.

Jean arrived at 8:03 AM carrying one briefcase and three stolen bagels. Management admired the initiative and stopped asking questions.

1977—NOW

Senior Bin Consultant

Identifies promising garbage from up to twelve metres away.

A+

CORE SKILL

Meeting Attendance

Nods thoughtfully. Has never opened the spreadsheet.

B−

EDUCATION

University of Outside

Major in snacks. Minor in leaving before security arrives.

???

ANNUAL_REVIEW.doc CONFIDENTIAL

MEMO 04-77 / HUMAN RESOURCES

SHOULD WE
HIRE JEAN?

Press the button and let an extremely reliable corporate system decide.

OFFICIAL FINDING AWAITING PAPERWORK

The printer is making a concerning noise.

CONFIDENCE 00%

UNFILED

02 / CORPORATE VALUES

HONEST HAIR.
DISHONEST TAIL.

01 Show up overdressed.

02 Protect the moustache.

03 Leave with the snacks.

Jean Jimothy posing against a vintage blue studio backdrop

HE PASSED THE VIBE CHECK

WELCOME
ABOARD,
JEAN.

Buy $JEANJIMOTHY Join the office

JEANJIMOTHY

PROFESSIONALLYUNQUALIFIED.